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Confessions Part Two…

May 11, 2012

Confessions, Part Two, a theme continued

I am trying to love yoga. I have the best of motivations—my best friend loves yoga and the clothes are cute. But it’s slow, and the music is bad. Seriously. Where’s the melody? Where’s the beat? Also, I don’t actually like to hear people breathe. My sister has been doing yoga to Elvis in her glass-art studio in front of the wood stove. We get down on the floor together at Thanksgiving and she does some yoga-y moves. She is 8 years older than I am and she looks good. She can also touch her toes without bending her knees.  I vow to do this by the 4th of July.

I’m trying to love yoga because I decided I need to add some variety to my exercise workout. By variety I mean something other than running. By running, I mean pounding a treadmill. I do run outside as well, but outside has hills and no air conditioning. Also no TV or mirrors. No big guy on the rowing machine with biceps the size of my thighs. I’m just saying.

And people honk when you run outside. Not in a good way. Actually, I don’t know why they are honking. They honked at my husband the other day. He fell down over by the Naval Academy wall coming off a curb and rolled into the street. People honked then. That was understandable Passersby asked if he was all right. He was bleeding but so embarrassed that he hopped right back up and kept running.

So I’ve upped my gym membership so that I can try all the classes. I tried “boot camp,” but we spent too much time doing stuff in pairs. I don’t want an exercise buddy—especially not a stranger- buddy and why was I paired with the instructor?

I tried the Barre class but when the teacher said to get weights I didn’t realize I’d picked twice the poundage anyone else had. I had to resort to faux lifting when she wasn’t looking.

So I was back in yoga today. We ended in corpse pose. I think they should work on the names a bit, too.

Write about something you or your character are doing for the wrong motivation: working at the soup kitchen to meet guys, going to church to please a spouse, having a child to fill an emptiness, getting married to find an identity. Just one scene that shows the true motivation of the character—or exposes your own.

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